Sorry this took so long, but ROYAL RUMBLE REVIEW!

Welcome back Smarks and Shooters alike, The Smark Shooter (after many delays, a new job like opportunity, and some procrastination) IS BACK. And while it's the night before Fastlane, I've been working overtime on a lot of posts for New Japan, Ring of Honor, Chikara, and Pro Wrestling Guerrilla BUT You're here for the Royal Rumble right? OF COURSE it's only the best Not Wrestlemania PPV in America! So as a huge warning, this one is going to be long, so if you don't want to read everything, Jump straight to the end of the blog and just read the Grades for the Superstars in the event.  But if you're in for the long run, there's a lot of spastic recap as well as my thoughts. Enjoy and Spread the word of The Smark Shooter. When in doubt, watch Pro Wrestling!

Spoiler alert: If you haven’t watched, go on the WWE Network for 9.99 and watch. Or….find it somewhere.

Royal Rumble review.

Pre Show thoughts:

The Intercontinental Title fluff piece was awesome for post 2002 standards.
Owens is the most straightforward heel in WWE today. He’s a heel to love, but still finds a way to tick you off. The condescending tone towards Jojo was just music to the ears.

Pre Show: Sandow/Young vs. Ascension vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Henry/Swagger.

Quick Note:To have it called the “One vs. All match” was very grating to hear. As if it wasn’t enough to have Reigns’s odds pushed in your face. Might as well call it a 1 on 29 tag match.

The Teams:

Dudleys  (Bubba Ray and D-Von)….Had a feeling they weren’t going to win. D-Von, as much as I appreciate him, just doesn’t conjure the starpower on his own to earn a spot. Bubba going out on his own would be cool at this juncture if they’re not going to win the Tag Team championships.

Jack Swagger/Mark Henry-my prediction to win the qualifier, mainly because I paid attention to the WWE’s youtube channel. Mark Henry had a video where he had made claim that this could be his last shot for the Rumble.  Having him fail after that video would have been wasteful (not that WWE isn’t known to be wasteful on plot). I enjoy Swagger as a face more than a heel….just something doesn’t click as much as I wish it would.  Also, Swagger (minus the We the People chant) still had a better reaction then everyone….minus one person.

Darren Young/Damien Sandow-I hate to say this….but Darren is just fodder for whatever team he’s on. Beyond irrelevant in this match….his sole purpose was to get Damien Sandow in the match. Sandow had the biggest reaction, just shows what happens when you get people to care: The fans don’t forget.

The Ascension:If they were in NxT, the crowd would have popped big. The main roster writers have ruined all credibility for Konnor and Viktor.

“HEYYYYYY WE WANT SOME SANDOW!”

Best reaction of the entire match: Sandow comes in, beautiful Russian Leg Sweep and the Kobito Akiyete (Elbow of Disdain….one of the few things I enjoy hearing from Michael Cole)

The fact that Darren Young had to earn his way in and Titus O’Neill didn’t seem right.  Titus and Darren should have been the Tag team to win this match, and already have Mark Henry in beforehand. Sandow could have technically been a surprise entrant considering how much time he’s had on tv since splitting from the Miz.  Swagger….you could have him team up with Sandow if he wasn’t a surprise entrant, or hell…Fandango could have been used.

The constant crap that Saxton has to deal with from JBL and Cole is getting tiresome.

Oh, and rewatching the match, I realized that Mark Henry wasn’t even the legal man. There was no tag from Bubba Ray to Henry, just Swagger holding him down with an Ankle Lock so Henry could give Bubba a splash. No tag, so Bubba Ray was still legal and so was Viktor.
Such a sloppy ending.

Winner: Swagger and Henry…

1.5 out of 10 Bull’s eyes.

The fluff piece for the DIVAS Championship match was phenomenal. And…..Booker having a stupid graphic is annoying.

End Pre-Show. 

Start of main show:
Vince lowering himself to Jojo literally was a funny figurative gesture.

Going into this PPV, in this guy’s opinion, there was so much emphasis on Roman Reigns that it was extremely off-putting. And this is coming from someone who did want Reigns to at least have a good showing. But considering the last two years having Reigns pushed down my throat, as well as the buildup basically being Roman Reigns and a bunch of “other guys” really had me rooting against Reigns from the onset of the pre show and all throughout.

Amway Center….shout-out to the Network Marketers out there!

Match 1: Last Man Standing Intercontinental Championship Match
Dean Ambrose vs. Kevin Owens

Ambrose as champion, coming out to a big ovation!

Owens coming out to an equally big ovation as well after the annoying announce team is introduced.

We have a Spanish Announce team on the end of the row, as well as a French commentary team on the other end. (hmm….is it French because of Kevin Owens’s Quebec residence?)

Match was a rematch from WWE TLC, where Ambrose originally won the title. Amongst the early fun parts of the match included Ambrose with a Huge Suicide dive that sent Kevin Owens straight into Michael Cole (YES!) and a SUPERKICK by Owens….then a HUGE Cannonball through the barricade to Ambrose!

Note: Didn’t know that Pat Patterson came up with the Rumble, pretty cool!

Owens lounges in the chairs while Ambrose tries to get up, Classic Owens.

Owens ended up taking out a table…..then he took a second one and put that one on top.  (If you’ve ever watched ROH, it might look familiar)

Pop Up POWERBO- countered into a Frankensteiner, and DIRTY DEEDS!!!!!!!!!!

Owens gets up at 8!

DIRTY DEEDS onto a chair!!!!!! (Byron Saxton and JBL calling it)

Owens rolls out of the ring to stand up! (Similar to Alberto Del Rio a few years ago!)

Huge Fight Owens Fight chant running as Ambrose gets ANOTHER table

HEEEEEEEEYYYYY WE WANT SOME TABLES!!!!!!!! (I love that chant. Thank you New Day)

AMBROSE with a Flying Elbow Drop onto Owens draped over the Table!

Ambrose and Owens up at 8 again!  Dean with another table but setting up this one in the ring…..well after he smacks Kevin Owens with a chair and they both trade “I HATE YOU(s)!”

Dean going to try for a Superplex through the table inside the ring, but OWENS countered into a GIGANTIC FISHERMAN’S BUSTER!!!!!!

Owens up at 7 and Ambrose back up at 9! POP-UP POWERBOMB!!!!!!!!!!!!

Owens continually screams stay down (which ironically would probably help Ambrose if you think about it) and Ambrose comes back up at 9 again!

Owens sets up 5 chairs to go for a moonsault onto Ambrose  with Dean spread across the chairs….when Dean in a last ditch effort sends Owens through the Double table structure set up originally by Owens.

GAME SET MATCH THAT’S 10

YOUR WINNER AND STILL CHAMPION:DEAN AMBROSE!!!!!!!!!

There’s something about indy guys and fantastic Royal Rumble PPV openers…Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt from 2014 being the most recent one before this year. One HELL of a match that is a great way to use the Last Man Standing gimmick in a PG environment.

9 out of 10 Bull’s eyes!

Craziest part of this match actually has nothing to do with their title match: Both men are also part of the Royal Rumble so off of this match alone, HUGE disadvantage no matter what number they enter.

Match 2:Tag Team Championships

The Usos (Jimmy and Jey) vs. The New Day (Kofi Kingston and Big E) w/Xavier Woods

Recap of how Chris Jericho of the Band Fozzy would destroy Xavier Woods’s trombone, Francesca that led to the Usos winning  against the New Day to earn their shot.

Fans cheer NEW DAY ROCKS and Francesca(correct) as Kofi and Big E come out…(for heels…they kinda suck because they get cheered lololol)

Originally there’s silence, followed by boos for the silence…until Woods comes out with a new golden trombone, Francesca 2.

“A brother’s got needs….” Oh boy……

HORN OF THE UNICORN SIGN! YU GI OH CONFIRMED!!!!!

The Usos were heavily booed. That should say enough about the booking…..and probably how bad it was to be associated with Roman on this night.

The key to smark crowds is simple. Don’t force things down our throats and we might actually pick who you want. Plus WWE called it “Entertainment” that’s on the competitors.

The commentators wasted time trying to figure out Rooty tooty and booty rather than talk about the match. Also, I get that JBL is a heel commentator but the personal attacks at Byron don’t feel like JBL directly insulting but more of Kevin Dunn making sure that NxT talent is belittled. 

SWEET Tornado DDT by Woods!Illegal, but still pretty freakin' sweet. 

Various chants: “Play Francesca Clap clap clap clap clap” “Heeeeeeeyyyyyy we want Francesca!”

Creative counter on the Superkick by Kofi, leading to a Big E splash.

Jimmy got BOOed bad. But he did have a SWEET Samoan Drop on Kofi and a (slow) Whisper in the Wind on Big E

Jey with a splash from the top of the Barricade onto Kofi…BIG E WITH A SPEAR THROUGH THE ROPES to Jimmy!

SUPERKICK BY JIMMY! Splash by Jey….with Xavier swinging the leg under the rope!

Suicide dive by Jimmy on Xavier….Big E takes him out with a football tackle into (but not throu

gh) the barricade)

Blind Tag by Big E….SUPERKICK TO Kofi….BIG E Catches Jey’s Splash attempt…INTO THE BIG ENDING! AND THAT’S GAME! Grooving to a win is The New DAY!

WINNERS AND STILL CHAMPION: NEW DAY!

6.5 out of 10 Bull’s eyes.

If the Usos had won the match, it would have been really raining boos in the Amway Center. Something tells me that the boos were foreshadowing for later. 

After that match and a few commercials (why?) they recap the Highlight Reel segment that attempted to paint Jericho as a threat….but it did make the Wyatts a great looking threat.

Wyatt Promo: Strowman….Rowan…..Harper….and Bray.

Match 3: United States Championship
Alberto Del Rio (c) vs. Kalisto

One of the many things I tend to complain about with WWE is that once something is taken from John Cena, they tend to discontinue their emphasis on the title or prize that is on the line. Del Rio really did nothing with the title since beating Cena for the title. Heck, the hot potato situation of the US title didn’t help matters at all for both credibility of the title and the champion.

The fans counted in Spanish when Del Rio was in the corner….and Kalisto with a nice Suicide Dive.

ENZUGURI!!!!!!!!! Del Rio’s best move honestly.

The commentators need a thesaurus. Coherance of the same descriptions depletes the originality of the commentators.

NICE Frankensteiner. (NOTE: Frankensteiner is a Hurricanrana without the pin attached at the end. A regular Hurricanrana ends with a pin)

Nice storytelling situation with the mask playing a factor in Del Rio’s heat. That being said, just because Kalisto and Mysterio are similar wrestlers, shouldn’t mean that-SUPERKICK BY DEL RIO-Kalisto’s comeback and go to moves should be the same. Seated Sentons weren’t part of Kalisto’s arsenal until he started this run as a main roster guy.

WHAT A TORNADO DDT by Kalisto!!!!!!

Del Rio with a reverse superplex that had a lot of force behind it.

Kalisto botched a Yoshi Tonic. And I mean it was a bad one. 

Double Footstomp dodged and Kalisto walks up the ropes into his Salida del Sol! TWO COUNT!

Second botch of the match….but frankensteiner into an exposed turnbuckle and SALIDA DEL SOL!!!!!!

WINNER AND NEW US CHAMPION: KALISTO

I feel bad for this match. Two great workers, but it was really sloppy when considering how good they actually are. Chemistry not entirely there.

5.75 out of 10 Bull’s Eyes.

Panel break (in other words…halftime and new bathroom break)

Recap of the preshow match (which sucked beyond belief)

Video package of Lynch vs. Flair plays as Divas are the Semi Main event. Wonderful storytelling in the preview!

SEMI-MAIN EVENT:DIVAS Championship Match

Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte (Flair) (c)

Pardon me for this match….the partisan journalism will show just a bit.

Lynch comes out, Steampunk resonating as the Dropkick/Flogging knockoff music has the crowd going. Charlotte coming out with her dad, The Nature Boy Ric Flair....And WE have legitimate in ring introductions! For as much crap as the Divas Revolution has been given, it’s good that at least 1 title match had this.

 There’s a Steamboat/Flair vibe going with this match.  (The Arm Drags definitely help this statement).  Clear good guy/bad guy differentiation

Alright let's just get the elephant out of the room shall we?

RAGE MOMENT: Ok, so in the current Network version of the PPV, the following segment is edited out. But if you’re curious you can find this on youtube or anywhere else. To help distract Becky, Ric Flair smooches Becky Lynch which leads to Charlotte attacking from behind. I don’t know who’s idea was this, but that was uncomfortable to watch. You could call it heel heat or whatever, but there’s a reason why it was taken off of the Network coverage: a few days later WWE was accused of being sexist and this was one of the pieces of evidence. It may be pro wrestling but….that wasn’t needed. It completely messed up the flow of the match and honestly the crowd (booing or otherwise) sounded.  Even JBL was struggling to justify it for a bit. If it wasn’t in the confines of a match, I would expect seeing your dad kiss your best friend on the lips like a playboy would be awkward at the very least….but then again Charlotte has allowed mention and even insult of her deceased brother in storylines so….God that was unsettling. (In any other medium, that’s considered Sexual Assault/Sexual Harrassment).

Now let's get back to the in ring action as best as possible.  

“That’s why I’m the champ” Charlotte borrowing from Kevin Owens in terms of in Ring trash talking.

ELECTRIC Chair drop to escape the figure four neck lock.

Becky went for the exploder but nice counter into the neckbreaker by Charlotte

Figure four attempt blocked by a punch, Becky's attempt of Charlotte tasting her own medicine turned into a sloppy cradle.

Another variation of the neckbreaker by Charlotte, but Irish whip (hahaha) countered into a half wrist clutch exploder (the full version is Jun Akiyama’s, which this wasn’t) by Becky. 

EXPLODER!

As much as I love Becky…her offense really doesn’t set the Dis-Arm-Her up that well. Maybe a submission that focuses on the back or the head would make more sense. With the Red hair and Irish stereotype, she could use the Bow and Arrow Lock (Brave haha) or a Liontamer (the Boston Crab with the knee into the back and neck).

Charlotte’s spears are equally as consistent Reigns. Part of it is dependent on the seller, which sometimes hurts the use of the move.

Very nice roll into the Cross Armbreaker by Lynch! 

Triangle choke transition, but Charlotte tries to go for a powerbomb and it works!

Yet another two count! (The match at this point had recovered enough at this point.

Charlotte goes for a baseball slide and hits her dad when Becky bridges out.

Rage moment number 2: CONE DO YOUR JOB!!!!!!!!!
Ok, Becky goes for her finisher and Ric Flair is not only on the apron, but throws his jacket at Becky. In essence that’s equal to throwing a shoe at someone. It’s a foreign object, thus making it a disqualification.  In these days, referees are blatantly selective of what they call to the point of blatant disregard for what remains of the rules. A) that’s a disqualification B) at least THROW THE OLD MAN OUT C) This is BS.

Charlotte does an eye poke, hits a second spear and that’s the end of this match.

DAMN IT!(Translated as Charlotte has effectively done her job and made me hate her in storyline….)

Winner and Still Champion: Charlotte (Personal bias....BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!)

John Cone…this is the second title match that you’ve screwed up, after last years Title match between Ambrose and Rollins.

Post match attack by Charlotte on Becky, which gives us…..SASHA BANKS!!!!!!!!

Sasha attacks and takes out Becky (DAMN IT), teases an NxT BFFs reunion….then attacks Charlotte and puts her in the Banks Statement! (Charlotte should have sold it more…I feel bad for how Becky ended up)

Banks attacking both keeps character in tact, but attacking Charlotte gives a reason to cheer.

Match: 6.75 out of 10 Bull’s eyes. Would have been 7.5 had it not been for the Referee and Ric Flair.

Post match segment: 8.5 out of 10. Would have been higher if Becky wasn’t just thrown to the wayside like that.

One last promo for Ride along  and Wrestlemania 32 (WHY FLO RIDA FOR THE THEME SONG?!?!?!?!?!) and then the main event.

Quick segment of a bunch of awesome and lucky fans who had the privilege to experience the performance center.

MAIN Event: The Royal Rumble Match for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship.

 During this the various things will be noted: Most eliminations, Iron Man time, Winner, Shortest time, Kofi Kingston’s way of avoiding elimination, winning number and other moments worth noting.

Video package for the Royal Rumble that is narrated by Byron Saxton (WHY NOT USE COREY GRAVES!????????? )While I understand the importance of the Championship being up for grabs, the emphasis on Reigns started to become annoying about halfway through the video promo. I GET IT! IT’S ALL ABOUT REIGNS!!!!!!!! X((((((

For the record, my predictions weren’t too great. I try to use all the stats and crap to attempt to pick a number. I usually end up going with 20 or 21. And it’s failed me for the last 2 or 3 years. I should have learned to go with someone later….but whatever.

Also, the last time a Superstar that wasn’t a poster-child looking superstar won, it was in 2006 with Rey Mysterio. So as much as a Kevin Owens, Cesaro, Seth Rollins, and Daniel Bryan type person is beloved by the majority of fans: Unless you’re at least 6 foot 2 and jacked, or just a giant of a man….odds are you’re losing. Am I lying? From 2007 to 2015, the winners were Undertaker, John Cena, Randy Orton, Edge, Alberto Del Rio, Sheamus, John Cena (again), Batista, and Roman Reigns. Sad face.

Oh hey the actual Lilian Garcia is ring announcer….and hesitated.

ENTRANT 1, Reigns was getting booed bad. (Why doesn’t that surprise me?)
While I’ll try to keep up with everything, after the match itself, some wrestlers may be grouped based on good, or bad performances

So Reigns is 1 and....

ENTRANT 2 IS RUSEV  

This is a good start since these were the last two in the Rumble in 2015, something that hasn’t happened since 2008 when the last two entrance of the previous Rumble (Shawn Michaels and the Undertaker in 2007) were the first two entrants in the next Rumble.

 Quick spear by Roman…and Rusev is eliminated.

RAGE 3: So number 3 is coming out, and instead of focusing on the Titantron….they keep the damn camera on Roman’s face. To the viewer, they have no idea what the hell is going on, and the Royal Rumble’s spontaneity and appeal is partially due to the crowd reactions on surprise appearances and debuts. So for the camera man, this Shooter should put one in between the eyes: whoever told you to stay Roman’s face should at the very least be kicked in the nuts because in the heat of the moment, you missed a fantastic reaction. Thank the lord that WWE’s youtube page gave separate highlights to this entrance because after they released the extra footage, I perfectly synced it so I could watch the aggregious Network coverage and the youtube one at the exact same time flawlessly.  Anyhow, when I saw this live, I screamed bloody murder in joy as…

ENTRANT NUMBER 3 IS AJ STYLES!!!!!!! HOLY CRAP I WAS GEEKING OUT ABOUT THAT!

STYLES CLASH ATTEMPT!!!!!!! PELE!!!!!!!!! Second Clash countered into a Samoan Drop. 

Entrant 4:Tyler Breeze! In Egyptian gear with selfie stick (should have ran with it!)

BEAUTY SHOT on STYLES!!!!!!!!! But the crowd with a bunch of AJ Styles Chants!

SUCH A COMBO by styles!

Styles puts up on shoulders, Reigns punches Breeze which leads to Breeze going over off of AJ’s shoulders and eliminated.

Entrant number 5: The Social Outcasts all come out…..And Curtis Axel, The uncrowned 2015 winner of the Royal Rumble, comes in (and I guess he represents the Social Outcasts? Boo! I wanted Heath and Bo and Rose in some for too!)

Axel and Styles getting the chants, with a nice knee by Axel on Styles.

Reigns tries to eliminate Axel, but is distracted by Slater who gets punched in the face

Styles with a sweet forearm on Adam Rose who does a sick flip bump. (Honestly, that should have stood out more than it did, because that was cool looking). Bo gets punched by Reigns. Reigns then kicks Axel in the back of the thigh, leading to the Mr. Perfect bump, setting up AJ with the clotheline on Axel to eliminate him.

ENTRANT 6:Chris Jericho  (This I can appreciate, because unlike the other part timers, Jericho tends to come out at early enough times where stamina HAS to be appreciated.)

Seeing Jericho and Styles in the same ring together was awesome (and then it happened on Raw and Smackdown and it was even better).

Entrant 7:KANE. I like this situation here. Kane was not likely to win, but this spot gives him enough time to pad his number of eliminations. It’s still a shame that Reigns broke Kane’s 13 year record of 11 eliminations in a single Rumble.

Entrant 8:Goldust! Hooray! I like Goldust, and I’m still waiting for that final Goldust/Stardust match that Goldust deserves. Still has a decent amount in the tank, as proven two years ago in his Tag Team Title run.

Entrant 9: Ryback comes down and there’s a surprising amount of boos, which is a bit surprising. He’s revamped some of his moveset (even though the Punk cheap shots aren’t needed any more). Feed me More chants make it easier.

Entrant 10 with a HUGE POP For the NEW Day! Xavier Woods looked to be the one going in, but the graphic spoils it by having Kofi Kingston in (Which is still great).  That being said…..not having Big E and Woods as official entrants (at least that’s how it looks)

Ryback with a HUGE Back Body drop  on AJ…but FLYING FOREARM by Styles on Jericho!

Right after Goldust tried to eliminate Styles, Woods says hi (nice TNA reference there haha).

Entrant 11 with what could have been boos but was probably dog sounds, Titus O’Neil.

House of Fire that Titus, and procedes to eliminate Goldust.

Kofi tries to eliminate Reigns (New Day should have tried to help)

Entrant 12  is R-Truth and HE PULLS OUT A LADDER!!!!!!!!!

R-Truth PULLS A Ladder and he thinks this is Money in the bank or the Ladder match for a title and the crowd goes nuts!

(Should have tipped the ladder over). Kane drags him down and eliminates him.

Kofi tries to eliminate Kane, Kane then nearly eliminates Kofi, but Kofi Lands on Big E (Called it!) and Kofi procedes do a victory lap on Big E’s shoulders as number 13 comes in.

Entrant 13 is Luke Harper of the Wyatt Family, otherwise known as the BEST Wyatt in the ring. Kofi’s eating popcorn as Harper enters.

Shortly after Harper enters, the League of Nations (minus King Barrett because he’s still injured? So Sheamus, Rusev, and Del Rio) come out at the call of Vince McMahon, pull him through the bottom rope and procede to mug him. And the cameras put the entire focus on this as the match continues. If I miss an elimination due to this, I’m going to be pissed.

Superkick by Rusev, Superkick by Del Rio, and Brogue Kick by Sheamus:Roman Reigns is down.

In the midst of this attack, Entrant 14 is STARDUST!

Rusev running across the French and English announce tables to Splash Reigns onto and break the Spanish announce table (eh, go figure.) He also gets a group hug from McMahon and his cohorts. Stretcher is coming out….and a logic break is about to come.

Entrant 15 (halfway there!) is The Big Show, who stares down McMahon and the League to ensure he doesn’t get mugged. Anyhow, Logic Break.

LOGIC BREAK RAGE: if they mugged the crap out of him, why not dump him back in and eliminate him. It wouldn’t be the first time someone illegally threw someone over. Hell, dump him in, and have someone else IN the match throw him over. Crappy writing.

Big Show eliminates Titus O’Neil as Reigns passes by on a stretcher.  He then knocks out Ryback, who had already been thrown over the top by Kane but had held on.

Reigns is walking alongside the stretcher but not on it? If the damn man can walk to the back, he can walk to the ring! BLATANT DISREGARD and WAY TOO OBVIOUS! (Btw, where’s Kofi?)

Entrant 16 is Neville and he’s booking it to the ring right past Reigns who is FINALLY on the damn stretcher. Springboard dropkick on Harper, sweet strike sequence on Stardust, and a Springboard Frankensteiner on Harper that was BEAUTIFUL!

Cuts back to Reigns who wants to walk back. If you can walk to the back, you can walk to the ring dammit! No nap breaks for you! (2 Hours 23 minutes and 18 seconds is a good spot to pause for Reigns’s official time. I would have done the same thing if this was possible in 1996 with Jerry Lawler hiding under the ring…but then again that would be pretty impressive for a 2.5 year old wouldn’t it lol)

DAMMIT! During all the Roman Reigns crap apparently Jericho eliminated Kofi. Was it before Big Show came into the ring or After? Well that ruins me keeping track of this manually, I have to look it up now! DAMMIT.

AJ still getting cheered! And they were worried about him not being recognized.

Entrant 17:Braun Strowman. Harper and Strowman, the two biggest threats that aren’t leading are now in the match.

Immediately, Strowman eliminates Kane (legit surprised considering how easy Kane and Undertaker dominated the Wyatts at Survivor Series.
Braun then chokes out Big Show, gets Show’s foot tangled on the top rope….and then eliminates him. (well damn….Kane and Show down by the same guy in 30 seconds. Not bad).

Entrant 18:KEVIN OWENS!!!!!!!! YES!!!!!!!!!! And he comes down limping due to the opening match. What a dude!!!!!!!!(C’mon Roman, Owens went through 2 Tables!)

And immediately starts brawling with AJ Styles! (YES YES YES YES YES!!!!!!!! PWG THROWBACK!)

Neville throws Styles, who sunset flips back in…Styles cl-SUPERKICK BY OWENS!!!!

“WELCOME TO THE WWE!!!!!!!” AND KEVIN OWENS ELIMINATES AJ STYLES!!!!!!!!!!(Now that was smart booking!)

Styles being cheered even after elimination. What a debut! Oh and Luke Harper goes “Bye Bye AJ” Nice touch!

Entrant 19: DEAN AMBROSE! YES! GREAT BACK TO BACK ENTRANTS! Coming off of a Victory in the Last Man Standing match for the IC title over Owens.

Owens and Ambrose immediately pick up from the opening match and Ambrose is taped up in the shoulder.

WWE tried to make me focus on the League attack, but instead I focus on the other screen! HA TAKE THAT!

Entrant 20: HOLY CRAP IT’S SAMI ZAYN!!!!!!! AND (since I’m finishing this really late, I’m using this. If you translate Sami Zayn to Arabic on google translate and then translate it back to English….>EL GENERICO !!!!! EL GENERICO NUMERO UNO!!!!! SI! SI! I’M STILL ECSTATIC TO THIS DAY!!!!! WOO HOOO!!!!!!!! LET’S GO!!!!!

ZAYN AND OWENS GO BRAWLING LIKE CRAZY TO THE BIGGEST POP OF THE NIGHT SINCE AJ’S ENTRANCE!!!!!!!!GO SAMI GO!

OLE CHANTS START! AND ZAYN ELIMINATES KEVIN OWENS! FINALLY SOME RETRIBUTION FOR 2015 FOR SAMI ZAYN!!!!!!! SAMI CHANTS GO!!!!!!

Entrant 21: Erick Rowan of the Wyatts. There are 3 Wyatts in the match now….oh boy…..

Neville Hangs on, only to get FLATTENED with the Discus Lariat by Harper.

Then Stardust set up by Rowan, and SUPERKICKED out by Harper (man, I like Harper getting the eliminations).

Entrant 22: Mark Henry, who qualified via Pre Show match.  Said it could possibly be his last, and he does his best against the Wyatts…only to be slammed by Strowman. The Wyatts team to eliminate Henry.
Harper with a HUGE boot on Zayn, followed by a club of a blow by Strowman, and Strowman eliminates Zayn (BOOOOOOOOOOO!).

Entrant 23 is…..BROCK FREAKING LESNAR!!!!!!!!!!!

Big Reaction for Lesnar! 1!!!!!! 2!!!!!!!!! Rowan Eliminated!!!!! 3 (two on Harper!) But couldn’t get Strowman (SAD FACE) But he knocked him down.

Entrant 24: Jack Swagger (oh poor soul) And get’s F5’d….and (cue South Park) He’s Gone.

4(AMBROSE) 5(HARPER)

Lesnar with some cool flying knees as 25 comes in.

Entrant 25: THE MIZ…his hood needs to go. The robe is fine.  And he does the SMARTEST thing in the match. Chooses to Sta-oh dammit. He was doing so well…then he said “I’ll turn Suplex City into Mizney World”…..Whatever grade I’m giving him is going down due to that alone. Please don’t make it trend.

Miz is in the match as much as Reigns is, so shut up Cole! 6 and 7 on Harper, 8 on Ambrose.  Smart move by Miz to stay out there. No complaints on this side. 9 On Harper…and Lesnar eliminated Harper!

Entrant 26 is Alberto Del Rio (that reminds me, the Usos and Kalisto aren’t part of this? Not Cool! Should have made it a 40 man rumble).

10 on Del Rio.  AND LESNAR ELIMINATES STROWMAN!!!!!!!!!!! (THANK GOD!)

Entrant and lucky number 27….BRAY WYATT (MAN THAT’S A NICE SPOT)

Staredown and pose by Wyatt…and The Wyatts surround Lesnar!

Part of me wants to count Lesnar dumping Strowman twice. 11 On Wyatt!

SUPERKICK TO BROCK to counter the F5, Sister Abigail by Wyatt and instead of doing the eliminating himself, he uses his followers to dump Lesnar for him. If I were Lesnar I would have went back in and Suplexed the CRAP out of  everyone left, like Vader destroyed everyone in 1996.

Entrant 28: DOLPH ZIGGLER….to a quieter pop than in year’s past. Batista’s wins are referenced…but it’s Ziggler.

Miz finally comes in, to try to eliminate Ziggler. It got really quiet once Miz and Ziggler came in.

Entrant 29 is Sheamus (well…this makes sense….and is a bit nauseating….HEY Roman Reigns is CHEATING DAMMIT! He took too long of a break! Not cool!!!!! Such a cheater! Attacking the mayo from behind. Now he eliminates Miz….to a chorus of Boos  as he eliminates Del Rio. Ziggler gets a bigger cheer as he tried to eliminate Reigns but Superman punch happens. (2 hours 47 minutes 47. Therefore the time that should be taken away from him would be…..24 minutes and 19 seconds.)

Wyatt is getting a few cheers for going after Reigns. Man, I was enjoying the Rumble for a bit. Vince tried to give a conquering hero…instead he gave a HUGE Villian for whoever number 30 is. Now….Bryan is gone (WAAAAAAAAAH) And so is Cena and Orton (WHOO!) as well as Cesaro and Rollins (BOOOOOO!)…who else storyline wise would make sense? Can YOU tell me who comes out at number 30? I’ll give you as many guesses as how many Hs are in Hunter Hearst Helmsley.

Final Entrant (WHAT a surprise) TRIPLE H. (I have a lot of mixed feelings about this…but at the live time….I was cheering.) The crowd was chanting Triple H, so once again writers and Vince, YOU FAILED WORSE THAN THE FAILURES I HAVE AT THE GRADING PERIOD OF THIS REVIEW.

And then Triple H pedigreed Ziggler (ha, Burial). Reigns Spears Wyatt (BOOOOOOOOO!) This is like Becky Lynch for Wyatt and Ziggler.

Reigns throwing some BOMBS and dude looks pretty legit pissed, which makes perfect sense. Ambrose watches as Sheamus tries to come back in. Wyatt with a Uranagi on Sheamus and Jericho woke up from the nap Strowman gave him

DAMMIT the dropkick should have ended Reigns after a beautiful Lionsault on Wyatt. Ziggler with the Zig Zag and SUPERKICKS HHH! Fame Asser on HHH….but then eliminated by HHH.

Face off between Wyatt and HHH…(OOH THAT WOULD BE AN AMAZING RIVALRY!)

WHAT A SHOT BY WYATT!!!!! Dammit….Brogue Kick by Sheamus on Wyatt……AND Sheamus eliminated Wyatt?? BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!

Reigns tries eliminated both men, but Enziguri by Jericho, Ambrose tries to get Jericho, Sheamus tries to get Ambrose.

Cross body by Jericho, CODEBREAKER BY JERICHO ON HHH AND AMBROSE ELIMINATES JERICHO!!!!!!!!

And with that, the Final Four is a sort of Stable battle: The Authority (workout buddies Sheamus and Triple H) vs. What’s left of The Shield (Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns). Two groan inducing candidates (Reigns and Sheamus), one middle of the road candidate (Triple H) and the beloved one (Ambrose).

Superman Punch on Triple H by Reigns. Brogue Kick by Sheamus on Ambrose.

Sheamus tries one more Brogue, but Ambrose dodges and Sheamus gets hung up on the Apron after going over. Reigns with a Superman Punch and Sheamus is GONE!!!!!!

TRIPLE H IMMEDIATELY DUMPS REIGNS! VACANT IS CHAMPION AGAIN!!!!!!!! REIGNS FINALLY GONE! NEW CHAMPION WILL HAPPEN!!!!!!SUCK IT and a bunch of other cuss words.

TRIPLE H AND…..DEAN AMBROSE? WHAT A FINAL TWO!!!!!!!!

I didn’t realize how much I wanted Ambrose as champion until now.

Ambrose psyching himself up as the announcers finally say intelligent things.

Dean is punching and biting and headbutting and everything. Let’s Go Ambrose chants rain down the Amway Center as finally a True baby face is facing the Authority with the Title on the line. I had chills as this was happening.

LOCK AND LOAD WITH ONE MORE LUNATIC LARIAT!!!!!

Triple H tried the Pedigree…AMBROSE THREW HIM OVER BUT HHH still on the apron! Tries a shoulder block and almost gets him. Knee by the Game

And Ambrose is Back Body Dropped to the Floor AND THAT IS THE GAME!

WINNER AND NEW WWE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION: THE COO AND THE CEREBRAL ASSASSIN TRIPLE H.

So as the authority celebrate, here's some stats, and grades for the participants for the event. 

Entrants by number: Roman Reigns, Rusev, AJ STYLES (!!!!!!!!), Tyler Breeze, Curtis Axel, Chris Jericho, Kane, Goldust, Ryback, Kofi Kingston, Titus O’Neil, R-Truth, Luke Harper, Stardust, Big Show, Neville, Braun Strowman, Kevin Owens, Dean Ambrose, Sami Zayn(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), Erick Rowan, Mark Henry, Brock Lesnar, Jack Swagger, The Miz, Alberto Del Rio, Bray Wyatt, Dolph Ziggler, Sheamus, Triple H (!...?)

Order of Elimination: Rusev, Breeze, Axel, Goldust, R-Truth, Kofi Kingston, Titus O’Neil, Ryback, Kane, Big Show, AJ Styles, Kevin Owens, Neville, Stardust, Henry, Zayn, Rowan, Swagger, Harper, Strowman, Lesnar, Miz, Del Rio, Ziggler, Wyatt, Jericho, Sheamus, Reigns, Ambrose, Triple H (WINNER)

Now here are the Grades for All Superstars that participate(Does not include the announcers, commentators, authority figures, Paul Heyman, or Ric Flair).

First, the Grades for the Non- Rumble Participants

Darren Young-He had to qualify and Titus didn't? Man, that's messed up. Not to mention he was the less cheered member of his team and couldn't qualify for the Rumble. Bad night for Darren:D

Damien Sandow –The only reason for his grade: He's over. The Crowd was begging for Sandow the entire Pre Show match. No A because he didn't win, but this is deserved. Bt

Bubba Ray and D-Von- They took one of the final blows, and honestly they didn't do worse or better than each other so same grade. They didn't win and the crowd wasn't behind them: C

Konnor and Viktor-They were pinned. And irrelevant. D

Big E-He stood out the most in the Tag Team Championship match and got the pinfall. Sucks he wasn't in the Rumble match. B++

Xavier Woods-He hit his spots, was his annoying self, helped the New Day with the victory and now has Francesca 2. B+

Kalisto-Sloppy match but Two Tie US Champ. B

The USOs-B for the match, D for the reaction, so C overall.

Becky Lynch-Good match but too much Ric. Plus how she was booked in the end was horrendous. C-

Charlotte-She retained....thats all. C

Sasha Banks-No match but biggest impact. A

Heath Slater and Bo Dallas- they teased being in the Rumble....then sent Curtis Axel as a representative. Really funny pre show segment though so that was helpful. C+ for both.

King Barrett-I don't know what the exact deal is, but he's wasn't even part of the Rumble mugging.....and he didn't come out with Del Rio for the US title match. Extremely disappointing. Did he even have any lines during the pre show? D--

Adam Rose- Now why did I separate Rose from the rest of the outcasts? Because out of all the eliminations and sells during the Rumble, Rose doing a flip after getting hit was honestly the best physical sell. Due to that alone, he stood out among the non participants in the Rumble. B

Analysis of the participants based off of both rumble results and pre rumble matches. (some grades will be higher in various categories. Like a disappointment might get a C whereas a run of the mill may still get a D due to expectations and momentum) The Numbers are when they were eliminated, not what position they entered.

Disappointments/YOU FAILED

1)Rusev- The dude was one of the last two of the previous year, he had eliminated 6 guys and this year he’s the first one gone. Oh how the mighty have fallen off their army tanks. Time in the rumble-1 minute and approximately 30 seconds and eliminated by Roman Reigns (1) 0 Eliminations.  While he did come back later in the Rumble to attempt to take Roman out via injury and while he did have a nice Splash onto the SPANISH announce table, his impact in the Rumble is the epitome of disappointing Grade:D

8)Ryback-at the beginning of January when Wrestlemania season began, he was pegged as one of the favorites before the WWE Championship was on the line. From there on out he was around….but pretty much out. Now with those expectations, why would I put him with Rusev here? Because even though he wasn’t pegged to win, he’s supposed to be a threat. Dude had a great rumble in 2013, being the runner up to John Cena, and had decent runs in 2014 and 2015. The fact that he’s just fodder this year AND no eliminations sticks him here. Bad Rumble for The Big Guy.

Time:12 minutes 30 ish seconds, eliminated by Big Show (2), 0 Eliminations. Grade: F

13)Neville- this one may be surprising, and even a bit unfair. While Neville is a guy who wasn’t really expected to do too much, and for what he did it was fine. But (as legitimate or not the Slammys are or the other various gimmick prizes that aren’t the Rumble are) if you’re Breakout Star of the Year and you barely do anything in the Rumble, you MORE than underachieved.  Was a valiant effort but I can’t justify putting him in any of the other categories. Time:10 minutes and change, eliminated by Luke Harper (1), 0 eliminations . Grade: D+

15)Mark Henry-You did an interview where he said this could be his final rumble (sin). You forced him to qualify at the pre show (sin). You teamed him with Swagger, but got overshadowed by Sandow (sin). He enters the Rumble, holds his own for like 15 seconds, then gets eliminated quickly. (sin) Hall of Pain? More like Hall of Sins. Time; 47 seconds. R-TRUTH LASTED LONGER. Eliminated by Strowman (3), Harper (3), and Rowan (1). 0 eliminations. Grade: F

23)Alberto Del Rio-man this dude had a bad night. Lose the US title, come into the Rumble, no eliminations from someone who won the 1 40 man Rumble? How have the mighty have fallen….more like how the mighty were screwed when he beat John Cena for the title. The writers have beyond punished Del Rio’s credibility. His highlight was a mugging that honestly only HELPED Reigns stay in the rumble.
At least Rusev finished on a high note, Del Rio’s night was not in Orlando.

Time: 7 minutes, eliminated by Roman Reigns (4), 0 eliminations. Grade F-

28)Roman Reigns-This has nothing to do with his performance while he was in the ring. That was run of the mill. What dragged him down so low was not only the predictability but also the failure of crowd direction, as well as the oversaturation (to which is not his fault.) I do not hate Roman Reigns. I actually like him. As much as I like Stardust. That being said, he was doomed from the start. Having the match be all about him was guaranteed to bring boos since Vince continuously shoves him down the fans throats. To make matters worse, the way he’s taken out is nowhere near illogical. Add in the missed camera angles, entrances, and eliminations ruined because of his storyline’s writing, and it made what would have been a good 3.5 to 4 star Rumble sink until he was eliminated. The illogical fallacies with Reigns’s booking was mirroring the horrific and inconsistent refereeing by John Cone in the Divas Championship match and the fans let him have it, deserved or otherwise. His performance in the ring admittedly was a B+. Most eliminations while legally in, and will go in the record books as the Iron Man. But his booking, and the fact that in the end, he loses the Championship to the storyline enemy is more than enough justification to put him in this category. Time:59:48 (minus 24:19=35:29). Eliminated by Triple H (2), 5 eliminations (Tyler Breeze, Rusev, The Miz, Alberto Del Rio, Sheamus). Grade: (B+  added to an F- on booking divided by the two grades)Considering situation, mugged and break otherwise….C

Underachievers/Left to be desired
2)Tyler Breeze-While he had a great 2015 in NxT as the gateman to the developmental brand and a great first month on the main roster, his push was dropped by Vinnie Mac since Vince doesn’t understand how to use new talent and Kevin Dunn (one of Vince’s right hand men) goes out of his way to screw up Triple H’s NxT talent.  So, to be in there less than a minute was actually to be expected. At least he hit the Beauty Shot on Styles and technically, he could always claim it took two people to eliminate him so, it could have been worse. Time: 1 min 18 seconds and eliminated by AJ Styles (1) and Roman Reigns (2), 0 eliminations Grade:C-

4)Goldust-He wasn’t expected to do too much, so normally it wouldn’t be hard to call his appearance run of the mill, but since Stardust and himself didn’t interact at all makes this an underachieving run. Not entirely Goldust’s fault since they needed someone for Titus to eliminate, but it could have been a better run. Time:6 minutes 18 seconds, eliminated by Titus O’Neil(1), zero eliminations, Grade:C-

6)Kofi Kingston-Kofi sadly has a niche in the Rumble: How does he survive elimination. He’s going to get eliminated, but how will he dodge it first? Unless something changes, he’s had his time and it’s very saddening. Plus unlike other years, being caught by Big E was highly predictable. From handstands and jumping from barriers to predictability lands Kofi in this category. Also, with the rest of the New Day not participating, similar to the Social Outcasts, it dampened the appearance even more. His saving grace in this event was his performance in the Tag Team Championship match.  Time:8:26, eliminated by Chris Jericho (1), 0 eliminations. Grade:C

14)Stardust-I could put him run of the mill, but that’s the thing. While he’s higher than the disappointments, its only because he really wasn’t expected to do damage. He was more of a threat in his past life as Cody Rhodes, who had the most eliminations in 2012. But Cody…err Stardust didn’t do anything. Didn’t help that Goldust was already gone by then and he barely interacted with Neville on a signinficant basis. Time: 14 minutes and change, eliminated by Luke Harper (2), 0 eliminations. Grade::C--

18)Jack Swagger- I put his tag team partner, who did better in the disappointment category, yet I have Swagger as just an underachiever. Why? Less expectations.

Time:30 seconds (Cole said 15 but I don’t listen to Cole). Eliminated by Brock Lesnar (2), 0 Eliminations. Grade:D

21)Brock Lesnar-Yeah, he’s supposed to be up higher. But other than the Wyatts and Swagger….Lesnar made much less of an impact than he really could have. 11 suplexes in my book were still not as much as he could have and being eliminated by less than 4 guys diminishes the aura for him as well. That being said, it moved the Rumble story along well and the way he was eliminated is technically justified. Time: 9 and a half Minutes, 11 suplexes, elminated by Strowman (5), Harper (4), and Rowan (2)(All already eliminated beforehand), 4 eliminations (Erick Rowan, Luke Harper, Braun Strowman, Jack Swagger)Grade:C+

25)Bray Wyatt-I could call him disappointing due to lack of eliminations, time in the Rumble and the fact that he automatically underachieved since he lost at number 27. That being said, his stareoff with Triple H created a great possibility for a face turn later on, as well as orchestrating Lesnar’s elimination (even if he didn’t do the eliminating) was enough to salvage him out of disappointment.  Time: 11 Minutes, 25 seconds. Eliminated by Sheamus(GROSS) (1), 0 eliminations-Grade:C

Run of the Mill/Eh…/Could be worse.

3)Curtis Axel-If nothing else, the gimmick he had for a year did work because people started to cheer for him. Axelmania ran wild for 6 months before Hulk Hogan got in trouble, and he was still able to use the fact that he was never eliminated. He’s in the run of the mill because lets face it, he’s a jobber that could have been used as comedy fodder more. But, he at least got in this year. Sadly no perfect plex and the rest of the Social Outcasts were taken out due to this segment of the Rumble so no Rose, No Bo, and No Slater. Props again to Adam Rose for the sweet sell. Time: 1 minute 30 seconds, eliminated by AJ Styles (2), 0 eliminations, Grade:D+

5)R-Truth-Truth was there for one reason: the comedic elimination. And boy did he do that well! Why isn’t this above run of the mill? Because there was no dialogue with any of the other participants (but it got Xavier Woods to laugh). That being said, good placement, good spot, and it also adds to Kane’s count. Time:58 seconds, eliminated by Kane (1), zero eliminations but the greatest ladder spot in the Rumble from memory.  Grade:B-

9)Kane-Always a threat, but not to win. Dude has 40+ eliminations in his career and that probably won’t be broken in the near future (unless Roman Reigns is booked to do so….DAMMIT) He got his elimination and eliminating him is still a feat no matter what anyone else says. Better use of him this year compared to last year so no complaints here. Time:19 minutes. Eliminated by Braun Stroman (1), 1 elimination (R-Truth) Grade: C

10)Big Show-Similar to Kane, always a threat,  could win (but that’s why he won the Battle Royal last year right?).  Eliminating Big Show is always a feat considering he’s usually the biggest guy in the match. Last year was appauling use of him and Kane so having them gone at the halfway mark was good. Time: 5 minutes, eliminated by Braun Strowman (2),2 eliminations (Titus O’Neil and Ryback), Grade:C+

17)Erick Rowan-while he did better than expectation….it wasn’t on his own merits. He had a third of two separate eliminations. Didn’t do much else. But not much was expected out of the weakest member of the Wyatts. Time:4 and a half minutes. Eliminated by Brock Lesnar (1), 2* eliminations (Mark Henry, Brock Lesnar*). *=after being eliminated.  Grade:B

22)The Miz- Not a lot of expectations but what he did do in the Rumble was smart. Once he got in he barely left any memory other than being Reigns’s first victim after his slumber backstage. But a performance I can accept considering it was the Miz. Time: 9 minutes. Eliminated by Roman Reigns (3), 0 eliminationsGrade: would have been a C, but then he said Mizney World.  So D/D+

24)Dolph Ziggler- He had the spark from last year….but had the same results, thrown away like a 6 month old sandwich. He had some of the biggest pops in the past because fans wanted to root for him and see him succeed, but since WWE has continually fed him to every person coming up and coming in and returning, there’s no more faith in him anymore. Credibilty gone way before Del Rio’s. Worst part is that him basically being Triple H’s bitch in this match was poetic. It’s only fitting that the wrestler who puts everyone else over is the sacrificial lamb for the heralded part-timer. What stops this from being a failure is that….this was kind of expected. Ziggler is the butt of WWE’s plans. Time: 7 minutes, Eliminated by Triple H (1), 0 eliminations. Grade: D

27)Sheamus-placement made storyline sense, being attacked and eliminated by Reigns made sense, antagonizing the crowd favorites and helping Triple H. All good points for Sheamus. Did what was expected, but I just don’t think there were enough people left for Sheamus to do better than a B+ at best and this wasn’t a B+. Time: call it 8 and ¾ minutes. Eliminated by Roman Reigns (5), 1 elimination (Bray Wyatt) Grade:C

Above expectation/Satisfied/Surprise

7)Titus O’Neil-Titus coming into this match did have some momentum so I figured he would get a hot run going and be out due to a dumb decision. He stays in long enough to get an elimination and gets eliminated by the biggest dude in the match. No complants on this one, good solid run by barking football midcard dude. Time:9 minutes 6 seconds, eliminated by Big Show (1), 1 elimination (Goldust). Grade: B+

16)SAMI ZAYN-Ok…ok….I have a huge wrestling crush on Sami Zayn very similar to my fandom of Daniel Bryan. I loved his mentor El Generico on the indys. Zayn is the perfect mimicker to that and more. To be able to come out to honestly the 2^nd biggest pop of the night at that point, eliminate arguably the best pure villain on the roster, and hold your own considering you’re still labeled NxT? That’s a great appearance right there.  Best part? He continued his war with Owens. Storytelling at its finest! What stops this from being top notch? He got eliminated by Strowman. Could have lasted longer but was enjoyable while it lasted. Time:5 minutes (eh, that’s a coincidence. See Owens, Kevin). Elimnated by Braun Strowman (4), 1 elimination (Kevin Owens) Grade: B

19)Luke Harper- I’ve been a huge fan of Harper since at least 2011, when I discovered that a big guy like him could do step-up frankensteiners and suicide dives…and Superkicks. The dude had 2 and 2/3rds eliminations on the night with some good ones on Neville and Stardust. Better than his performance two years ago. Time:14 minutes, eliminated by Brock Lesnar (3), 4* eliminations(Neville, Stardust, Henry, Lesnar*) *-See Rowan, Erick. Grade: A--

26)Chris Jericho-While the stats will say otherwise, in terms of actually staying in the match and competing until elimination, the true Iron man of This rumble was Chris Jericho. While it seemed like he tended to attack basically every favorite of the fans, he had a legitimate time out there, got an elimination that made storyline sense, and created intrigue when he faced off with Styles, Triple H, Reigns, and Ambrose. A few more eliminations would have pushed him over the top but Y2J with another great Rumble appearance. Overhyped coming in, but backed up enough to earn a high rating and grade. Time:51 minutes. Eliminated by Dean Ambrose (1), 1 elimination (Kofi Kingston), Grade: B++

Superior

11)AJ STYLES- The Face of TNA and the Top Gaijin of New Japan finally comes to WWE and makes an immediate splash! While people knew he was coming, no one really thought he could start off at the Rumble in the Rumble match for the Title but he did. He outshined EVERYONE that he was in there with, especially Roman Reigns. Still a little ticked about his entrance, but two eliminations is nothing to scoff about and a great amount of time in, overall great booking here. Time: Call it 30 minutes. Eliminated by Kevin Owens (1) (who was honestly the ONLY guy they would accept Styles being eliminated by without any huge backlash), 2 eliminations (Tyler Breeze and Curtis Axel), Grade: A

12)Kevin Owens:I was tempted by both personal favoritism and circumstance to put him in the highest category but I’ll justify putting Owens and Titus in the same section. On the low side, he didn’t last very long, he only had 1 elimination, and to the casual fan, Owens got eliminated by a CURRENT NxT guy. And the casual fan (rightfully) believes that NxT is predominantly WWE’s Triple A affiliate;The final minor league to the main roster.  On the plus side, and why he’s up in this category: He was the right and only guy to eliminate AJ Styles, he did it early enough in the Rumble to avoid ending controversy, he was in the Rumble amidst the hellacious  Last Man Standing match where he went through three tables and drove his opponent through a fourth, and the person eliminating him is not only the biggest victim of his superior 2015, but his rival stretching all the way back to his beginnings in IWS in Canada. Finally, he had the match of the night with Dean Ambrose. Now that’s a story right there. Time: 5 minutes. Eliminated by Sami Zayn (1), 1 elimination (AJ Styles) Grade: A-

20) Braun Strowman- I don’t like this, but I have to give credit where it is due: like it or not, Strowman was responsible for 3 solid eliminations and was 1/3 of two more. Plus the girth of the eliminations: Kane, Lesnar, Show, Henry. Add Sami Zayn to that and that’s good quality of eliminated. I don’t think he deserves a big push yet but if he proves himself later on I think it’ll be good. Great performance from the former Rosebud (YEA I WENT THERE!). Time:18 minutes. Eliminated by Lesnar (4), 5* eliminations (Kane, Big Show, Mark Henry, Sami Zayn, Brock Lesnar*)*=see Harper, Luke. Grade:A-

29)Dean Ambrose-What a night for him, retain the IC title in the match of the night, enter at a great number in 19, make it to the final 2 and have the entire crowd proving to Vince McMahon that you had the wrong Shield member the entire time, and finishing runner up. Dean was already a star, but seeing him with Triple H didn’t seem anywhere out of place, heck it seemed just right. Ambrose, if he didn’t prove it before, it better be written now, HE’s the main eventer the fans do get behind. Time:30 minutes. Eliminated by Triple H (3), 1 elimination (Chris Jericho) Grade:A

30)Triple H-While others will argue his placement here considering the easy road, Triple H wins the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. Biggest winner hands down. Doesn’t matter the amount of eliminations. For being a bad guy, he was the conquering hero up until the final 2, then he played his role properly. The fans didn’t want Reigns and they got what they wanted: Reigns not being the champ. Triple H continues the pattern of Adonis/Big guys winning the Rumble, but storyline wise, it was the best choice. Now its up to those damn writers to concoct a story that ends with a face Reigns or a better person in general going after the title at Wrestemania.
Time:9 mintues.  WINNER , with 3 eliminations (Dolph Ziggler, Roman Reigns, and Dean Ambrose) Grade: Well…he won the title and got the correct response at the end: A.

Final Results:WINNER Triple H @ #30

Most Eliminations:Braun Strowman and Roman Reigns (5)

Iron Man (in record books):Roman Reigns 59:48

Iron Man (taking into break) Chris Jericho: 51 Minutes

Biggest Pops:Styles, Zayn, Lesnar, Triple H, Ambrose

Biggest Boos: Roman Reigns

Shortest time in rumble:Jack Swagger, 30 seconds.

Match: 7 out of 10 Bull’s Eyes.

PPV: 7 out of 10 Bull’s Eyes.

Best Match: Ambrose vs. Owens.
Worst matches: The Pre Show Tag Team Match, and The US Championship match.

Winners on the Night: Damien Sandow on the Pre Show, Dean Ambrose and Kevin Owens for Match of the night. The New Day for basically ruiling over the tag team division, Sasha Banks for a triumphant return, AJ Styles for his debut, Chris Jericho for his performance, Titus O’Neil for a good performance, R-Truth for the ladder match segment, The Wyatts for a dominating middle of the match, especially Luke Harper and Braun Strowman, Kevin Owens (again) and Sami Zayn for the ultimate example of storyline continuity

BIGGEST WINNERS: Dean Ambrose for his hellacious night and Triple H For Winning the WWE World Heavyweight Championship

Biggest Losers of the night: , Henry and Swagger for their Abysmal performances after pulling out an ugly victory in a bad preshow match, Kalisto and Del Rio for an underperformance, The Usos for getting booed, Becky Lynch for her booking, Charlotte and Ric Flair for how the match went down and the controversy that followed it,  Rusev and Del Rio for their falls of graces, Ryback for such a disappointing showing, Kofi Kingston, just because that save was predictable, Dolph Ziggler for the cherry on top of his underappreciated value, and most importantly…

Biggest Losers: The Writers for overexposing Reigns. Vince, for his delusional thinking that he could pull of Reigns being an underdog, and ROMAN REIGNS. Because while he may have gotten some buys….he didn’t get the reaction and was overexposed.